Kill me now

I have always dragged boyfriends to clothing stores and made them look at numerous outfits for hours before making my mind up. Not only look, I’ve made them comment as well – I say “made” because mainly I’m always the one talking, they mostly agree: “I like these pants, but the seams are kind of weird, no?”, “Yeah, sure”. For hours on end. And obviously I’ve heard that men dread going into such shops with women because that’s exactly what they get: an endless parade of shirts, skirts, pants and dresses that they have no interest in, while we girls try to figure out what’s flattering and what’s not quite worth the big bucks. But I’ve always figured men are being rather dull, because obviously good clothes can be really interesting, if not fascinating, almost. Hmmm, I was wrong.

I was recently dragged into a Sears by a (male) friend. He is quite the handyman, he works fixing cars up and building boats and what have you. Therefore, he is a toolkit addict. Therefore, I was screwed.

After we’d already spent a good 20 minutes roaming around the store – at first I was trying, looking at all that stuff, not knowing what most of it was for – I decided to give him some time and go look at the women’s clothing section while he was in awe with all the tools for sale. Turns out Sears is shit for clothes (don’t go there) and I was done very quickly. Which put me back at the start, trying to convince my friend it was time to go. Please.

But he was nowhere near to being done, and kept telling me how awesome everything was. “Look at this saw. Do you have any idea how much this thing weighs? This saw can cut through wood like it’s butter”. Oh, yes. Wow. “Have you ever seen a tool like this? It stretches your wrench so you can reach in deeper while working on an engine”. Ah. “Oh, I haven’t seen these for sale in ages, let me go ask the sales guy if they have it in the 2-inch-gage”. Oh dear Lord, please take me away from here, never to come back.

So there you have it. I’ve learned my lesson. I had never figured out exactly how much boyfriends suffer while I try on some clothing candidates, but now I know. I had to learn it the hard way, and I tell you right now it wasn’t easy – we spent at least an hour in that shop, but it surely felt like a week. So cease this opportunity, ladies, be glad that I went through it so you won’t have to, and let your men enjoy freedom while you shop.